


Don't Forget

by foreverinprinxietyhell



Category: Video Blogging RPF
Genre: AU, Alternate Universe - High School, Angst with a Happy Ending, Being Walked In On, Best Friends, Depression, Disturbing Themes, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Heavy Angst, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Inspired by Doki Doki Literature Club!, Intervention, M/M, Multi, Poetry, Protectiveness, Reading, Self-Esteem Issues, Self-Hatred, Suicide Attempt, Unrequited Crush
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-23
Updated: 2019-02-23
Packaged: 2019-11-01 16:18:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,112
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17870573
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/foreverinprinxietyhell/pseuds/foreverinprinxietyhell
Summary: Based around Doki Doki Literature Club and the relationship between the player and Sayori. I also took inspiration from Caleb Hyles' version of "Don't Forget", which you can check out here https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_WzObiHuGgc:





	Don't Forget

It was easy to fall into a false mindset that the world would be better off without you especially when it felt like unfair punishments were being dealt left and right; dark thoughts would not let up and it was getting tiresome. Worn out from having to fight inner demons on a daily basis while going on through life as a newfound adult, you were desperate for a way out even though there was one last reason to stay around for longer, your lifelong friend Felix. 

The two of you had gotten through so much together, forming a strong bond that transcended the cultural boundaries of befriending a foreigner even as children. For years you had protected each other throughout an ever-growing educational career from bullies, bad grades, and the occasional heartbreak cultivating into your senior year of high school that would at least end a part of the ache settled deep within your bones. Even though each day became increasingly harder to face with inner strength running out the thought of disappointing your best friend kept the struggle a possibility rather than a lost cause.

“(Y/n), wake up!” the Swedish born boy called out from outside the ajar window, knuckles rapping against the frame for extra emphasis, “C’mon, we’re gonna be late again!”

“Five more minutes…”

“That’s what you always say, not this time!”

“No fair!” you exclaimed with a whine, peeking up from the nest of blankets to be met with a pair of ice blue eyes twinkling with amusement at usual banter, “It’s so cold though, how do you expect me to get ready?”

“Guess I’ll have to find someone else to give this coffee to.” 

Motivated in an instant by the fact that Felix had brought along two thermoses filled filled with brewed beverages each mixed with different amounts of sugar and creamer to help combat against the chilly morning. Honestly that alone would not have been enough to get you to face demons that came to visit on a daily basis, but the boy waiting on you did not need any more reason to worry; he already did as is and that alone made you feel a burden to be around. 

Throwing on a generic black long-sleeve overshirt on top of a slightly stained sleep shirt, you threw the strap of a forest green backpack with an assortment of pins attached over your shoulder. Reluctantly toeing on a pair of beaten up shoes, you joined the slightly older man and grabbed the steaming cup handed over as you both walked along the familiar sidewalk toward the school.

“Thought you’d be in a better mood, (Y/n).”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” you ask with fake annoyance after taking a sip of scalding coffee, leaving your throat feeling raw for a moment, “Not much has been worth the hype lately.”

“Not even becoming vice president of the literature club? You wouldn’t stop talking about it a few months ago.”

“Oh, right. Are you gonna join like you promised?”

“I might, there’s also the anime club.”

“At least come to the first meeting and then decide? I told the other members I’d bring someone.”

“Don’t make promises you can’t keep,” the foreigner warned, sighing softly and rubbing at the back of naturally light blond hair upon noticing how uncomfortable you were with that particular phrasing, “If it’ll make you happy then I’ll swing by for a bit.” 

“That means a lot, Felix.”

After the final bell rang for the day, you immediately went to wait at your best friend’s locker that way he would not possibly get lost finding the classroom that was being borrowed for the meetings. Nervously you clutch one of the thick straps belonging to the heavy book, spotting Felix in the thinning crowd as he approached with a soft half-smile when eyes met across the distance; those bright blue beacons always guided you back to shore like a boat being brought into port by a rustic lighthouse, “Finally!”

“Sorry, had to ask about tomorrow’s assignment.”

“In all the years we’ve known each other, that’s a first…”

“Excuse me for wanting to try getting into university,” the Swedish man retorted with a gentle nudge of an elbow into your side, “Let’s get goin’, shall we? Don’t wanna keep your friends waiting.” 

Escorting him down the vacant hallway you both climbed a few flights of stairs before entering the designated meeting space where three others waited patiently. A somewhat shy boy with dyed red hair that passed the small of his back was the first to be introduced as Dave, adjusting thin framed glasses in order to manage anxiety, the next being a curly haired person with bright green eyes and an artistic streak named PJ; both British boys seemed to be close even though they were in two completely separate worlds set in place by a smudged sketchbook and a pair of earbuds spewing out fast raps that could be heard from a few feet away. 

“Hello there, I’m the president Marzia!” the cheery, blonde Italian girl greeted your friend as she came next, “I’m glad (Y/n) kept their word in bringing someone new to our club, make yourself at home and have a cupcake.” 

“Oh, I don’t want to impose.”

“Nonsense, Dave made them for today’s meeting.”

“Well, if you insist. I, uh, just wanted to check it out,” Felix remarked with a slight blush as the two continued to chat casually, “Guess I can stay a bit longer though.”

“You better, or I’d have to kick some ass for grabbing one of my baked goods and skipping town.” the man in question stated matter-of-factly, one bud falling out from his ear, ruggish charm making the threat more convincing. 

“I’ll remember that.”

“C’mon he’s bluffin’.”

“Shut it, Peej! At least someone would’ve been intimidated.” 

“Keep tryin’, bud.”

Back and forth banter continuing the group gathered to share stories and poems that everyone had been working on; while PJ seemed more adept at drawing characters he was also able to give backstory and plot to connect seemingly unrelated topics. Lost in a long tales and flowing lyrics from the dynamic duo, you present a poem passed off as something less sinister than the fact there was a double meaning lurking just underneath the murky surface, but you dismiss the seriousness surrounding it as a coincidence at best. 

Agreeing to meet again like this the next day after another half hour of sharing creative content you and Felix walk home in the same fashion as earlier that morning, small talk filling the silent spaces while a gentle breeze blew a few browning leaves from the branches overhead, “Can I ask you something, (Y/n)?” 

“You already did.”

“Y’know what I mean,” he retorted in a gentle tone, small smile raising the corners of his mouth for a few seconds before turning to a serious demeanor, “That poem you recited… that wasn’t a suicide note, right?”

“How do you mean?”

“Well, you’ve been off lately and I remember how you used to struggle with those kind of thoughts, I just wanted to make sure.” 

“Give me some credit, Fele, I haven’t tried anything.” 

“That’s a relief. If anything changes, I’m always here.”

Farewells given for the day the two of you went separate ways and continued on as normal, homework and social media taking up the rest of your energy before falling asleep on plaid sheets that were more than halfway off of the mattress covered in crumbs. Waking up to only repeat what happened yesterday with slight differences, life seemed as if it could not get to a much better quality as the world around you blurred over, the only constants keeping you afloat being the after-school activities you were now sharing with Felix.

An upcoming festival would have usually brought up spirits since it was an annual event that the school put on and considering this would be the club’s first time being recognized, but if you were to be completely honest the occasion seemed lackluster. Jealousy was also factoring into your relationship with the foreigner as he started to gravitate toward the other guys who belonged to the organization even though you could not bring yourself to start any confrontation, letting them become friends without interfering even if it meant walking home alone one faithful day. 

“Sometimes a person’s mysteries are untold even to themselves,” Marzia read off in an eerie tone that caught your attention despite not being quite put together as you absentmindedly stared into the wooden top of a desk, “That’s not to say that you should have them figured out by our performances at the festival, but it would help to try a bit.”

For an unexplainable reason those words haunted you to the very core of a tormented soul trying not to give in to temptations that grew stronger every single day, excusing yourself early from the meeting with an excuse that would not make sense only to a closely kept friend since he knew you hardly got sick. Hot tears would have welled up against thick eyelashes, yet being out of touch with emotions to the point of only feeling numb made it nearly impossible for them to form, concrete echoing faintly underfoot as you went to a place that no longer seemed like home; no matter where you went it only felt as if space was being wasted even behind closed doors. 

Bordering on the brink of a breakdown nimble fingers picked apart a silver colored tie-back curled around the end of a set of thin, light blue curtains; that simple piece of rope had been a part of the room ever since you moved in years ago and was allowed to decorate, yet it seemed to have a more sinister use now. Using your bed as a platform you manage to secure the end on a small hook that once held up a set of fairy lights once a tight knot formed the desired noose. 

One thought accompanied you to the end: _I hope Felix doesn’t blame himself._

Woven fibers dug uncomfortably into your exposed neck as you were poised at the end of the messy bed, for even though there was no alibi that would excuse the hanging at least some would think of it as a freak accident. One foot teetered forward as muscles tensed to make a final jump, taking a deep breath as you sprang into the air when you were met with a force that knocked you back, almost assisted in the act when thick fingers worked hurriedly to loosen the weapon of choice replaced by a helping hand that guided you to the headboard where a pile of pillows and plush toys awaited.

Strong arms sandwiching you together, you had never seen Felix so vulnerable, so shaken as tears slipped past eyes squeezed shut as his bearded cheek buried against yours, ‘Thank fuck I got here in time!” 

“Felix, I-I’m…”

“Shh, you don’t have to explain,” he mused, combing through messy hair as he confirmed you were in one piece, “We can sit here ‘til you feel ready to talk about it.”

“It’s weird, you were the last thing I thought of when I… Why did you come after me? Won’t Dave and PJ worry?”

“You come first, (Y/n). Just… Promise me that you won’t try and leave again, please.”

“You were the one who said not to if I can’t keep it.”

“You know I’ll sleep over here to make sure nothing like this happens again. I can’t force this, but I want to help, to protect you any way I can!”

“...I’ll try.” 

“That’s all you can do,” the Swedish born stated, keeping an eye on you as he moved to retrieve a bottle of water from his backpack that had been thrown to the side haphazardly, offering it and assisting you in drinking, “Don’t forget, I’m with you in the dark.”

“It’s hard not to, I’m glad you came. I… didn’t know how much I needed you ‘til you came back.”

When the pain inside controls then suffering soon follows once given easier access, forcing fake smiles to cover up evidence of what was actually going on as if finely orchestrated. Then again, hurt could not take over completely, for there was a place in a sensitive soul where the one being attacked knew could combat against such tempting options; solving such complex emotions was not so simple since thoughts would not be silenced, yet at least someone else seemed to believe in that potential while you worked toward being able to do the same.

**Author's Note:**

> If you enjoyed this fic consider tipping!:  
> paypal.me/MordecaiRussell
> 
> Subscribe to PewDiePie!:  
> https://www.youtube.com/user/PewDiePie


End file.
